is about a list I made
while thinking of sleep...
1. Bears are notoriously oversensitive.
The bear, disconsolate, will think back through all your interactions leading up to the brick before blowing up your inbox with sadness.
2. Bears are allergic to bricks.
A bear, if struck in the face by something it's allergic to, will become totally unreasonable. It won't even apologize for mauling your mom.
3. Bears refuse to be attacked by anything beginning with the letter B.
If a bear is attacked by a brick, a boatswain, a Burundian, the Bermuda Triangle, or Bette Midler, its rage can consume twelve city blocks.
4. Bears turn into Wolverine when angered.
If you thought a bear was bad with claws and a nasty 'tude, just wait until its skeleton gets coated in adamantium.
5. A bear's prerogative is to kill you anyway.
Why give it a reason to do what it's hankering to do anyway? The bear was probably giving you an easy shot just to justify its rampage.
